Guest Post by FDL BSN (yes-the pink is in honor of Breast Cancer Survivors)
College Choices
Recently, I was vacationing with an old friend and mother of three. The weather was gorgeous, the view spectacular and we had not a care in the world. Nirvana.
What do Moms talk about as they lay around poolside, sipping on frosty cocktails?
Afraid so. Kids. This mother of two teens shared that her daughter just did not want to follow her older brother to the family alma mater.
College Graduation
We talked about how the teen is quieter and more studious than her sibling. Our discussion dredged up memories of my own quandary as my kids approached decisions about college. Shortly after this discussion, I happened onto a really interesting article in the WSJ-on choosing a college….
A lengthy article, it contained lots of suggestions about why families so often make bad choices when selecting colleges.
The authors take a reasoned approach to comparing the apples of school financial aid packages.
They give not one solution to how to pay for college or online universities, but better than that, they make you consider why we pay for higher education, whatever the cost. Finally, and to my mind, the most insightful, is a dissection of the short term gaze we use when making such a long term commitment.
Weighing Costs and other college choice intangibles:
What I took away from the article:
- Cognitive traps and biases can affect the decision making process.
- Recognizing your own cognitive traps and biases can help you lessen their affect on your families college choice.
- As college is a joint production between the student and the school, fit matters. What works for one, may not for another.
- The benefit and the cost requires a long time investment perspective, an uncommon view for most families.
- Use a spreadsheet to compare financial packages. Real comparisons can be extremely difficult.
- How and how much to finance for a college education requires weighing benefits and costs further than the eye can see-a real cognitive trap when deciding how much to finance.
- College is an investment for students in themselves and for parents in someone they love. Perspective is difficult.
- Graduation statistics show a 20% decline in graduation for those who choose a lesser institution over the more selective one they had qualified for.
- Knowing your own child and being willing to be objective about his future potential is so important.
College expense huge for many families
College educations are an enormous expense.
When you feel college is the right choice for your child, paying for the opportunity can be staggering. With our two children, we made tough choices with the first child and have many regrets a decade later.
With the second child, easy choices came along and all seemed to go well.
Our regrets/mistakes for child number two are totally different, but are no less real-and it wasn’t obvious for several years.
If you are looking at schools and planning this area of life, you have my empathy. It may take only a decade or two to understand the decisions you are making now.
Good luck. You’ll need it.
FDL BSN is a frequent guest poster. She is a public health nurse, and serial entrepreneur.
Dr Dean’s thoughts:
Cognitive traps and biases-”What the hell?” My take on the research is: If we want our kids to go where we went to school or where we think society thinks is best-the kids success will be unlikely.
Kids shouldn’t be expected to make $100+ K decisions as a 17-18yr old with teenage hormones and teenage world views-they need guidance.
But grownup guidance, not “I didn’t get to live my dream, so I will live my dream through my child” guidance…
Reader questions:
Did you “help” your children make a mistake in what school, what major, or amount spent on education? Spit it out, shout it to the rooftops-you’ll feel better. You still may owe $100k but you’ll feel better….
D.D.
{Photo credit: Cushman Library, Texas A&M c.c.}
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Tags: choosing the right college, how to decide which college is best, making the right college choice, should the parent or the child choose the college
I am considering a DNP program that will cost me $80 K and take me 4 years. During which time, I am assured that I can work and perhaps even full-time for the first 2 years. However, I am one of the lucky ones, in that I have a choice. I could go to another much larger research oriented university in the same town for 3 years and approx. $40-50 K, but not be able to work while in school. I am choosing the more expensive school due to the smaller and more established program. They also seem to be more focused on education than research. So, overall, I think, for me anyway, this will be the better investment–though it is a very hard thing to do from a emotional/financial point of view.
Hey Andrea, good luck. Make sure you check under every rock for scholarships. Try to find a clinical position that may want to pay for part of your education for a work commitment from you. That amount of debt would scare me to death in this economy. But maybe you have a plan to deal with it. I hope so!
When you get out, make sure you keep your lifestyle in check so you can pile money towards that debt. Don’t let it hang around for the next 30 years….
Thanks for sharing your story and would love others opinions.